Ernest Hemmingway

So… here we are… watchin’ the Northern weather forecasts, thanking our lucky stars for a sustainable groove here in the Southern tip of Florida. Now, Ronnie absolutely hates urban traffic snarls, especially in new territory. We’re close, but not really in the vortex of Miami. Traffic’s still a tangle in rush hours, but Ronnie says he’s getting used to it. We found a fantastic library and reasonable provision outlets. Life may not be Island time, yet, but we’re only 3 hours from Key West. All things considered, conditions couldn’t be much better as weather has been a balmy 55 to 78. The best part…? No skeeters… 😉

So… The Keys? Ya… we took that drive last weekend… here’s the report:

THE GOOD: Imagine a place where the Margaritaville state of mind isn’t just a Jimmy Buffett song, but a freakin’ way of life. Welcome to the Florida Keys, loopers, where Tevas are formal wear and the most pressing decision is whether to have your Key lime pie on a stick or in a graham cracker crust. (Pro tip: get both, you hedonist). And the water? So turquoise and clear it looks like a cement pond built for Jed Clampett himself. Fish practically jump into boats, begging to be fried up with a side of hush puppies. And the sunsets? Forget about it. Like Poseidon took a paintbrush dipped in mango and fire and just went wild across the sky.

THE BAD: Of course, paradise has its price, and in the Keys, it ain’t cheap. Be prepared to shell out some serious clams for a condo that’s smaller than your first apartment. And speaking of shelling out, if you get seriously ill, well, let’s just say the medical facilities here are about as advanced as a World War II field hospital. Oh, and did we mention the hurricanes? Mother Nature throws a tantrum every now and then, and when she does, those pastel-colored houses go flying like confetti in a wind tunnel.

THE UGLY: Remember that turquoise water? Yeah, well, sometimes it’s teeming with more tourists than fish. Think Spring Break on steroids, but with more retirees in Hawaiian shirts. SIDE NOTE: We paid retail therapy visits to Wal Marché, Targé, and the nearest indoor shopping mall. NONE of the locals wear Hawaiian shirts. And good luck finding one on the retail racks. Result? Wherever we go, Ronnie looks like a freaking tourist. Which… he totally is…. LOL. Anyway… mosquitos in the summer? We’re told these aren’t your average backyard biters, oh no. These are kamikaze skeeters, dive-bombing your ankles with the fury of a thousand tiny vampires. Bring industrial-strength repellent just in case, or you’ll be itching like a fiend in a flea circus.

WHO’s WHO in the KEYS?
Papa Hemingway: Yeah, the big kahuna himself. He lived and wrote here, probably with a daiquiri permanently glued to his hand. His house is now a museum where you can practically smell the testosterone and typewriter ribbon. By the way cat lovers, the Hemmingway House is home to nearly sixty of those furry buggers. Many of them have an extra toe.

Tennessee Williams: The playwright who brought us “A Streetcar Named Desire” also found inspiration in these steamy islands. Maybe he was drawn to the drama, or maybe he just liked the cheap margaritas.
Jimmy Buffett: The patron saint of flip-flops and frozen concoctions. He didn’t exactly hail from the Keys, but he sure made a career out of singing about them.

WHAT to SEE CRUSIN’ the KEYS?
Dry Tortugas National Park: Seventy miles west of Key West, this place is like stepping back in time. Think pristine beaches, crystal-clear waters, and a Civil War-era fort. Just watch out for the ghost of Dr. Mudd.
Bahia Honda State Park: This is where you go to find that classic postcard-perfect beach. White sand, swaying palms, water so clear you can see your toes even when you’re up to your neck in it. It’s enough to make you ditch your shoes and never wear them again.

BELIEVE IT or NOT:
Island rebellion? Key locals once broke away from the US like those Texans threaten to do whenever there’s a Democrat in the White House. They call their movement, “The Conch Republic” That’s right, the Keys once seceded from the Union. Well, sort of. It was a protest, but they still have their own flag, their own currency (the Conch Dollar), and their own wacky sense of humor.

Fantasy Fest: Imagine Mardi Gras, but with more body paint and fewer inhibitions. This annual festival is a celebration of all things weird and wonderful, and it’s definitely not for the faint of heart.
Underwater Music Festival: Where else can you listen to Bach while surrounded by coral reefs and tropical fish? This quirky event is a must-see for any music lover with a sense of adventure.

So there you have it, loopers. The Florida Keys, a glorious, messy, hilarious, and utterly unique slice of paradise. Just remember to pack your sunscreen, your sense of humor, and a whole lot of cash. And if you see a guy in a Hawaiian shirt riding a bicycle with a margarita in his hand, that’s probably just Wimpy channeling his inner Jimmy Buffett. Offer him a cheeseburger on Monday. He’ll gladly pay you Thursday.

Onward through the fog… RH

From Saint Auggy……
To Tallahassee…
You’ll see the fire ants..
Prolificacy…
And like the bears in…
Yellowstone grassy…
Don’t look FL Man in the eye.

Before you ask, Michigan has no natural hot springs. It’s like they forgot to install the geothermal plumbing when they were building the place. But who needs that when you have The Great Lakes, right?

As for higher learning institutions, Michigan offers a diverse range of colleges, from small liberal arts institutions to larger public universities. Some notable smaller options include Kalamazoo College, Hope College, and Albion College.

And though no particular state can claim exclusive dominion over such literary juice as earned by Papa Hemmingway, the Ernest Hemingway House in Oak Park, while technically in Illinois, is a popular destination for fans of Mr. Hemmingway’s distinctive American voice. Other notable literary figures with Michigan ties include Zane Grey and Harriett Beecher Stowe.

Regarding the unique character of its natives, Michiganders often pride themselves on their resilience, hardworking nature, strong sense of community, the fact that they have seasons other than winter, and abundant natural resources foster a love for outdoor activities and a down-to-earth mentality. If you had to drag on Michigan, some feel the state’s reliance on the automotive industry leads to economic instability. And, of course, the long, harsh winters can be a challenge for many, contributing to a sometimes slower pace of life.

Now, none of this does justice to the eye popping, slightly paradoxical, rolling green/crystalline beauty of the Upper Peninsula (UP). This region is often hailed as Michigan’s crown jewel, offering pristine lakes, dense forests, and dramatic cliffs. The Pictured Rocks National Lakeshore is a particular standout. Ronnie is holding his hand up right now because we just drove through the lower part of the UP heading for Traverse City. He has been going on and on about how much of this place looks like those “Garden of Eden” images conjured up in his childhood Sunday School days. This place is straight-up gorgeous, but if you get here via some of what William Least Heat-Moon described as “blue highways”, you will encounter areas that also conjure up mental images left behind by those 1980s slasher movies, “Halloween”, “Friday the 13th”, etc. Ronnie kept remarking how the areas we drove through gave him “Chrystal Lake” vibes. Terrifyingly beautiful, if you will.

Regarding famous Michiganders, the list spans the political spectrum, from Henry Ford, to Rosa Parks. And, of course, Michigan has a strong legacy in music. Think Motown, Stevie Wonder, Aretha Franklin, Four Tops, The Supremes, Smoky Robinson, Marvin Gaye, Gladys Knight, The Temptations, The Jackson freaking Five, and Stevie Wonder. Then later, you have Madonna and Marshall freakin’ Mathers. Mic drop… top that, anyone?

Now, as Michael Moore, Oscar-winning film maker from Flint, describes in his movies, the automotive industry has been the backbone of Michigan’s economy. Unfortunately, too many eggs were placed in that basket and when the US had to make painful changes in order to compete with the automaking sectors of the rapidly developing world, many… many… were left behind as a consequence.

That said, the state is trying to diversify, with growing sectors in healthcare, technology, and agriculture. Some would say Detroit and Flint still have a long way to go providing opportunities for those left behind. The jury is still out, but in the meantime Michigan offers a relatively affordable cost of living compared to many other states, especially in terms of housing. The state’s strong public education system and evolving job market, particularly in healthcare and technology, are also attractive to workers.

Visitors, often rave about the Great Lakes, especially Lake Michigan, for swimming, boating, and fishing. Again, Ronnie has his hand up, he’s still in awe of the terrifying beauty of Lake Michigan, and Traverse City. Many visitors are drawn to the vibrant college towns like Ann Arbor and East Lansing, offering a lively atmosphere and cultural attractions. As well, Michigan’s literary history can be a draw for some visitors, particularly those interested in Hemingway or the Great Lakes region.

Ok… that does it for now…

Stay safe…
Stay well…
Good luck…
Pay it forward…
And as always…
Onward through the fog.

Cheers… R.H.

In Michigan…
You might go dizzy…
From the rust belt struggle…
To Traverse City…
From the rogue militias…
To Motown dishes…
This state is pure America!

Loopcircus

Loopcircus

This Land – Florida: Part III (cruisin’ the keys)

This Land: Michigan